ok this might be a weird question but genuinely asking.
i'm 4 months into searching after graduating and every time i take a day off or sleep in or watch something that isn't an interview prep video, there's this voice that says 'you haven't earned this, you don't have a job yet.'
been telling myself rest is productivity, self-care blah blah. i intellectually believe it. but the guilt doesn't care about intellectual beliefs.
is this just new grad brain? does it get better? how do you actually turn it off?
6 replies
market_realist
week 31. it doesn't fully turn off but it gets quieter. what helped me: scheduled rest. like actually calendared. 'friday afternoon is off, no guilt because it's planned.' the guilt feeds on ambiguity.
newgrad_neil
the ambiguity thing is real. when everything is technically fair game the guilt has nowhere to go. gonna try this.
quietquit_quincy
employed and still feel this lol. the guilt is just the anxiety wearing a productivity costume. the job doesn't actually care how guilty you feel on your days off.
firsttime_mgr
i manage people now and i'll tell you: the candidates who come into interviews clearly running on empty do not interview well. rest is not separate from the job search. it's part of it.
newgrad_neil
this framing actually helps more than 'self care is important.' making it tactical somehow bypasses the guilt logic.
sam_recovering
new grad brain is real but it doesn't disappear on its own. you sort of have to practice resting the same way you practice anything. the guilt is a skill issue, genuinely. took me a while to believe that.