i took two years off to care for a parent. made peace with the gap. prepared to explain it. had my story down.
what i did NOT prepare for was how destabilizing it would be to re-enter the job market when i had already spent two years rebuilding who i am outside of a job title.
my whole caregiving period was about stripping away the 'senior analyst' identity, the hustle, the output metrics. i got to just be a person who showed up every day for someone who needed me. that was the most meaningful thing i'd ever done.
and now i'm back in a world where the first question is always 'so what are you looking for next?' and i don't always know how to answer without feeling like i'm putting the old armor back on.
i'm not falling apart. i'm okay. just... sitting with the weirdness of it. curious if anyone else has navigated this particular flavor of job-search complexity.
6 replies
sam_recovering
the armor metaphor is really accurate. there's a version of 'professional self' that job searching asks you to perform that doesn't always fit the person you've become. i feel this even without the caregiving piece.
returner_ren
right. and the strange part is i don't want to go back to who i was before either. so i'm sort of trying to find roles that fit the current me, which is harder to articulate than 'here are my skills.'
nonprofit_nia
i'm making a similar transition and the identity question is something nobody really talks about. you can prep for the gap question. you can't prep for who you want to be on the other side.
corp_refugee
this is one of the more honest things i've read on here. most people frame career breaks as something to overcome or explain away. you're describing it as actually formative. that's different.
firsttime_mgr
for what it's worth, as someone who has hired: candidates who can articulate genuine growth during a gap are more interesting to talk to than candidates who are clearly trying to shrink it. the authenticity is visible.
returner_ren
that's actually reassuring. i've been so worried about whether to lead with it or downplay it. maybe just being real is the move.