Imposter Syndrome · Primly Community

imposter syndrome vs actual skill gap, how to tell the difference

ds_dmitri · 5 replies

This is something I've thought about a lot and I think most conversations about imposter syndrome skip over it.

There are two different problems that feel identical from the inside: You have the skills but don't believe you do. You don't have the skills and are correctly sensing a gap.

Both feel like imposter syndrome. The advice for one can make the other worse.

For case 1, the usual stuff applies: collect evidence of past wins, notice the cognitive distortion, talk to people who've seen your work.

For case 2, what you actually need is to close the gap, not to feel better about the gap. Telling a data scientist who doesn't know their causal inference to "feel more confident" is bad advice. The nervousness is accurate.

So how do I actually tell which one I'm in? Some things that helped me:

Ask someone whose opinion is calibrated. Not a friend who'll be kind. Someone who will tell you the truth. "Do you think I'm actually ready for a staff DS role or am I missing things?" A mentor or honest peer can separate these.

Look at whether your anxiety is domain-specific. Imposter syndrome tends to be global ("I don't belong here"). A real skill gap tends to be specific ("I'm not confident on the ML system design round in particular"). Specificity is a clue.

Try teaching something. If I can explain a concept to someone more junior and answer their follow-up questions, I actually know it. If I fold under basic questions, the gap is real.

Track where the anxiety is loudest. If it's loudest in your actual weak areas, listen to it. If it's loudest everywhere, it might be the syndrome.

The mix is almost always both. There are real gaps and there's also cognitive distortion on top of them. Separating the signal from the noise matters because the fix is different.

5 replies

ml_mike

this is the post i wish i'd read 5 years ago. the domain-specific vs global anxiety thing is a real diagnostic. when my self-doubt was evenly distributed across everything it was probably more syndrome. when it was loudest in system design specifically, there was a gap.

staff_steph

The teaching thing is the best heuristic here. I've used it to diagnose my own gaps for years. If I can't explain something to a junior engineer without eventually bullshitting, I don't know it as well as I think. You figure out pretty fast what's real knowledge vs pattern-matched confidence.

ds_dmitri

yeah exactly. the bullshitting moment is very diagnostic. you can feel it when it happens.

hardware_hugo

counterpoint: most imposter syndrome content is targeted at people who already have the skills. but this whole genre also reaches people who have real gaps and convinces them that their accurate self-assessment is just a cognitive distortion. this post is a good corrective.

director_dee

when i do performance reviews i try to give specific, observable feedback so people know what's real vs what's just nerves. most people are calibrated incorrectly in both directions. they think they're worse at some things and better at others than they actually are. a good skip-level or manager relationship helps a lot here.